13 Lunches You Should Never Take to Work

Note from the editors: This article, published in 2017, does not align with our commitment to antiracism. Read more about our archival work here.
- Michael Graydon + Nikole Herriott1/12
Head-On Prawns with Chile, Garlic, and Parsley
You want your reputation to proceed you in the corporate world, not your garlicky shrimp breath.
- Romulo Yanes2/12
White Bean and Tuna Salad with Radicchio
Can do? Please, can don't. The description for this canned tuna and white bean salad says it’s perfect for a weekend lunch or a weeknight dinner. Which means this works anywhere but an afternoon at work.
- Zach DeSart3/12
Fried Chicken Biscuits
Because unless your afternoon to-do list includes napping, there is no way in hell you’re getting anything accomplished after a fried chicken biscuit.
- Photo by Tom Schierlitz4/12
Smoked Turkey, Blue Cheese, and Red Onion Sandwiches
Smoked turkey is a sensible, inoffensive, and healthy lunch. Topping it with funky blue cheese and mint-impervious red onions will ruin your life.
- Photo by Brian Yarvin5/12
Scottish Rabbit Curry
Unless you want the water cooler gossip to be about you, avoid bringing in aromatic dishes like this rabbit one. (Also, who brings rabbit to work?)
- Photo by Chelsea Kyle, Food Styling by Anna Billingskog6/12
Kale and Brussels Sprout Salad
There's a reason kale smoothies are so "in" right now: they're not nearly as ear shatteringly loud as this nutty salad.
- Photo by Alex Lau, Food Styling by Sue Li, Prop Styling by Elizabeth Jaime7/12
Aromatic Shrimp and Noodle Medicine Soup
The name really says it all. If you’re ahem slurping this for the medicinal properties, you shouldn’t even be at work. Go home. And take your shrimp with you.
- Michael Graydon and Nikole Herriott8/12
Poached Salmon with Artichoke Confit
This poached salmon and artichoke would be a clutch spring weekend brunch dish, when you’re not collating papers, trying to find out who stole your stapler, and smelling up the entire cubicle.
- Christopher Testani9/12
Spaghetti with Tomatoes and Anchovy Butter
Brown bag this anchovy pasta to work, and you may start needing to wear a brown bag over your head.
- Lara Ferroni10/12
Turkey Meatball Garlic Bread Heroes
Just try eating this meatball sub without getting any marinara onto your keyboard. And good luck keeping this Italian bread from getting soggy. Not even the employee-of-the-month can do that.
- Photo by Joseph De Leo, Food Styling by Mira Evnine11/12
Caesar Salad
If they’re not already using headphones to secretly (or not so secretly) listen to Rihanna, your office mates will need them to drown out this sound barrage of romaine and croutons. Top this salad with anchovy dressing, and pretty soon you'll get a call from HR.
- Levi Brown12/12
Tuna, White Bean, and Red Onion Salad
You work a 9 to 5, which gives you approximately 16 other hours for eating this loud and smelly salad. Seize the day, folks.